The common thieves of your peace are fear, worry, and anxiety. And these all go hand-in-hand. Worry causes anxiety and both stem from fear and the loop repeats itself. 

Worry causes anxiety, both stem from fear, and the loop repeats itself.

Worry is something that I know very well. When I was a kid, my uncle often called me a worrywart starting from the moment I could talk. I used to worry about everything – everyone else, myself, tomorrow, next week, next year…

I also took on the worry and fear of those around me as my burden to bear. Then as I grew up, I took all of that worry into adulthood. If you ask my grown kids, they’d probably say some of it even jumped onto them (sorry about that kids!).

Where do fear, worry, and anxiety come from? They all indicate you are anywhere but the present moment.

Let’s do a quick exercise and I’ll show you what I mean.

Give yourself permission to forget about the past and the future for right now. For the next 10 seconds, you are completely off the hook from all responsibilities. Now, close your eyes, take a deep breath, and just sit.

Did you feel the relief of permitting yourself to let go of everything but this specific moment? There is a palpable peace that washes over you.

You’re not thinking about yesterday. You’re not thinking about tomorrow. You’re not thinking about the next moment. You’re just right here, right now.

That’s being present.

So how do we do this more often?

Step one is looking at the bigger picture – internally – and listening within to figure out where the worries are coming from. Break them down until you can find the true root cause.

Sometimes we’re led back to a memory or a series of memories. I find that there is a distinction between a memory and our idea of what the memory is. Now that you are older and wiser, is there a new way to see that memory?

Through this exercise, you are taking control of your feelings and building your ability to listen within.

Now if your worry is faced toward the future, the exercise might look a little different.

Close your eyes, feel the worry/ fear/ anxiety, and ask it – what am I afraid of? What is going on? Where is this coming from?

Hell, I even name it. What or who is speaking to me? Is it my inner child? Is she fearful? Is she having a temper tantrum? WHO is this coming from?

Does practicing this exercise mean that worry/ anxiety/ fear will be gone forever? No.

Will this particular worry/ anxiety/ fear be gone forever? Also no.

See, humans are like an onion. We’ll heal that first layer, but there are deeper layers that still need our attention. However, the healing process gets easier the more you do it. It’s about building the momentum to carry you through the tougher times.

Some may read this and say to themselves, if I’m always going to be working on this, why bother?

The answer is simple.

What are these thieves stealing from you? What is this fear/ worry/ anxiety costing you? Experiences, connections, opportunities, and growth.

How many times have you not gone somewhere because you felt fear, worry, or anxiety?

How many times have you missed out on an opportunity because you were afraid that you weren’t good enough?

How many times have you not applied for a job or promotion because you didn’t meet every single qualification?

How many times have you let a cutie pass you by because you couldn’t fathom the idea of talking to them first?

When you can lay down your worries/ fears/ anxieties and tune into the present moment, you allow yourself to focus on what’s real and what’s truly important.

The future no longer exists.

Now you can enjoy the connection. You can enjoy the growth. You can enjoy being with yourself and with the people that you care about the most.